Abridged Worship – January 12, 2025

In our commandment series, we previously looked at the command to forgive way back in 2024 on November 3rd. To help aid the concept of forgiveness, we watched a video clip of a young woman, whose father died in the line of duty as a police officer. This story of sadness went viral because of this young woman’s desire to forgive the man who killed her father, and she came to this desire even though her heart was riddled with pain. But in faith, and with forgiveness in her heart she was able to have love and compassion, and even to the point where she longed for this man to know Jesus. This is how we encountered the theme of forgiveness.

With that in mind let us give a definition to forgiveness. Forgiveness is a conscious and deliberate decision to release feelings of resentment or vengeance or entitlement to reparations towards a person or group who has harmed you, regardless of whether they deserve your forgiveness.

We are called by Jesus to forgive others in the same way that God forgives us first. And if you have ever been personally wronged by someone, you know how difficult it can be to forgive in the way God calls us to. Sometimes it feels like the person does not deserve forgiveness, other times we do not feel ready or willing to forgive, and other times we are not sure what good forgiving will do.

But still, the command stands. And, if this command wasn’t challenging enough, we also have to remember the humility needed to grasp the command of forgiveness fully, sometimes we are the ones who need to be forgiven, and we should seek, to own up to our shortcomings, our errors, our prejudices in all our lives. Maybe in our tensions with others where we hold back our forgiveness, we have had fault too, we made mistakes, and maybe we are partly to blame. And sometimes, maybe we didn’t have a role to play in the sin between us and another but we still need to be able to see those who wronged us, not as villains but as flawed people, just like us. Whatever the case, we are called by faith to dive deep into healing the relationships between people through forgiveness as God has set forth.  

But that is just the process of forgiving. Jesus in his teaching also connects us to this idea of reconciliation. Often forgiveness and reconciliation are used synonymously, which is understandable because there is a core value between them but there is a subtle difference.

Reconciliation is a bit different than forgiveness. Reconciliation is the bookends around the narrative of forgiveness. It is the desire to see the pain and anguish of resentment and hatred cured and replaced with respect, love, and harmony. Reconciliation is a lived-out action when two people or two parties acknowledge one another and can discuss the nature of sin between them, seeking mutual opportunity to make amends, with the hope that the two will come back together reunited, healed, and possibly stronger than they were before.

It is not possible to have reconciliation without forgiveness, but I have seen forgiveness without reconciliation.

A good example of forgiveness without reconciliation can be a divorce, not in every circumstance but sometimes. I have met people who when they were married and living together, could never see eye to eye, maybe they got married for the wrong reasons or had two different world views, so when they were together, it was all gnashing of teeth and slashing of claws. But after separating, they see the errors, the flaws in themselves and the other and they forgive. The forgiveness is had but they go their separate ways.

 Another example of this would be two people in tension with each other, where one person forgives, and the other doesn’t. Sometimes that is as far as you get because the one half is unwilling to progress.

So, forgiveness is hard enough sometimes, and reconciliation can be difficult to do, and not always felt like it’s even an option. But Jesus still calls us to both.

And He calls us to this in not a minor way. He says, if you have a conflict with someone, go reconcile with them first, before offering your gifts at the altar to God. That is no joke to Jesus. Jesus is saying, before you do religious things, before you try to honor me with praise, sacrifices, and offerings, first honor me by doing the will of the Father, reconcile with those you have wronged and who have wronged you.

How many of us here may have someone we need to reconcile with before we continue to do the religious thing? If you have someone you need to call or meet to seek that reconciliation, by all means, rise up and go, go do the will of the Father. You can catch the rest of my sermon on recording tomorrow.

Now I wish I could assume that no one ran out because not a single person here has any ill will with anyone in the world. But more than likely it is because what Jesus is asking is really heavy and living it out can be very complicated.

And God is not ignorant of life complications, for example, I do not think Jesus would expect us to seek reconciliation at the very moment someone has wronged you. You still have to face situations and deal with your limitations and others. For example, if an unhinged man with a gun mugged you one night, first you need to deal with the dangerous situation at hand, before thinking about forgiveness and reconciliation. I don’t think Jesus would expect you to be like…  

“Hey Mr. Gunman, you’ve done some wrong, I’ve done some wrong, can we just hug this out and reconcile.”  

No, not every situation calls for reconciliation immediately, but it also doesn’t mean we shouldn’t have it in mind as part of our response to all things.

Remember that young woman again, after hearing the news and feeling every emotion under the sun, that young woman decided that she wanted to forgive her father’s killer and longed for him to know Jesus. Longing for him to know Jesus is a truth statement about her long-term ambition for this man who killed her father. For Christians, generally, when they want someone to know Jesus it means, they want them to be Christian, to be saved by Jesus, which would mean she would want this man’s sins to be forgiven not by just her, but by God, so that this man could dwell in eternity with her. Her forgiveness was not just about her well-being, I am no longer going to hold onto the negative feelings, but her faith called her to care about her enemy’s wellbeing, his welfare, and his salvation, her faith calls her to the completion of forgiveness which is reconciliation.

So no, in the moment a gunman tries to mug us we might not jump to hugging it out, but our hearts in faith hope that one day we might be able too. We might be able to bring Jesus into the conflict, to heal what is broken.

So how do we know when, how, and what to do to forgive and reconcile, especially when life, people, and every circumstance is different and difficult?

I wish I had an answer for all of life’s nuances, but the best I can offer is this word: “disposition.” As Christians, we are called to have a disposition toward forgiveness and reconciliation because God first forgives and seeks reconciliation with us.

We should cultivate in ourselves a practice of reconciliation and forgiveness, and as we cultivate this disposition, we will surely encounter people and circumstances in which we will have to exercise it.

Whether the offender is a brother or sister in Christ, a biological family member, a stranger, or a known enemy, if our hearts have the disposition of God’s love for people, longing to reconcile, then no matter the circumstance, we will be better for it, even if we don’t do it perfectly.

Remember last week, I spoke about the watchmaker metaphor, God forgives us through the cross, and by Jesus upon the cross and the descent of the Spirit, the watchmaker gets into us, and begins to repair what is broken. That repair work is the reconciliation that encapsulates, motives and springs forth from the forgiveness of the cross. It is God’s desire to reconcile us to Himself. That knowledge of God’s love for us broken, sinful, and stumbling creatures is what should motivate us to offer the same disposition to those around us.  

And even though forgiveness and reconciliation are difficult if you have let the Watchmaker in, He will be with you, and you will bring the Watchmaker in to help you out with all those other broken watches too.

Let us pray…

Lord, we seek to reconcile our hearts with You and Your will. Let our lives be a sign of our trust in Your wisdom and grace. May our ministry here become a light to the world; that upholds Your mission of reconciliation. Amen.

Homework: